So it marks one week since I stopped calorie counting. It’s been liberating. Everyday I reflect at the end of the day how I’m feeling, how I felt about the day… Why I feel the way I do, what I can do differently. I can’t lie and say this whole week has been easy… There’s times when anxiety comes in and tries to scare me. But I have to face my fears and I have to overcome this.
Calorie counting no longer rules me. This obsession I had with food and dieting is dying. It’s going to be DEAD.
That’s why I say… I rule my roost!! I will overcome this.
I’m LOVING eating meals again with my family, not obsessing over how many calories are in a meal… Or how the generous tablespoon of butter that my mom added affected the calorie count of that nights dinner. Who the hell cares!!! It tastes great!
I mean, I still choose healthy options and enjoy my veggies, fruits and fiber rich foods… But knowing that I can have ANYTHING I want when I’m hungry, is amazing.
Trying new recipes and cooking new things, makes me feel like me.
I’ve gotten to enjoy many things…..
Pancakes (6-grain pancakes with added shredded coconut)… With bananas and syrup!
Deconstructed chicken pot pie…. Without the pie… But with homemade biscuits… AMAZINGGGGGGGG. I don’t even know if this name makes sense for it, hahaha. It’s a recipe-free dish… Just made it with ingredients we had at home.
I’ve also had many more delicious things… Like I discovered the amazing combo of a cut up apple (into cubes), with melted peanut butter… And a small handful of chocolate chips.
Tastes almost like a candy apple in the weirdest way?? But awesome nonetheless.
Today was an emotional roller coster. I got lots done but I have been feeling mentally and emotionally drained. I was supposed to go out Saturday but canceled because I was so tired. But I’m glad I stayed home.
Just an hour ago I was saying to myself “I’m so done with today”, while crying… and now I’m laying in bed thinking “life is good”. Oh dear. What a difference an hour can make to someone who is pmsing.
I’m okay… Really, I am.
And I only have 13 days left of classes until exams… Then I’m free for a month! Yippee.
Did I post that I booked my summer vacation to Orlando? Well I did. I’m going for over a month. I’ve never been away from home for so long before. I feel like such a little kid when I say that. The longest I have ever been gone is probably 2.5-3 weeks. I’m going for 5 weeks!!!!!!! I’ll be there for 4th of July as well. Two years ago I was there for July 4th.. That was the first time I had ever been to Orlando. This is my third summer going there… I have been very blessed and fortunate.
With the fact that I’m going for 5 weeks in mind, it makes me want to make a bunch of girlfriends in Orlando to hang out with when the boyfriend is working. The only problem is that I won’t have my own car to drive around or get places.
I’m going to take with me a bunch of books and read…. And at least he has a pool… So I’m going to read… Enjoy the pool…. Relax… Spend time with his family… Spend time with friends.. I want to pick up a hobby of some sort. But what?! I’m going to look that up